Goin’ To The Golf Course and We’re Gonna Get Married….

As I previously babbled here, the night before I married Scope I slept just fine.

Mm-hmm.

It sounds like a steaming preposterous pile o’ poo, I know, and I’m sorry, but it’s true. Everyone told me brides panic the night before they get hitched, and that I’d be staring at my ceiling allllllllllllllllll niiiiiiiiiiiiiight lonnnnnggggggg, fretting, sweating and regretting what I was about to do. But no. I slept perfectly fine. I even had normal dreams.

Pffffft! I know. Go fig.

*shrugging*

I woke up feeling happy, calm, and not the least bit nervous. Not even a single butterfly. Not one. Of course, I kept expecting the nervousness to sniff me out sooner or later and then pounce and gut me like a fish. Why wouldn’t it? I mean, I was about to get married, okay?

MARRIED!!!!

*gasp*

ME!!!!

*shock*

WHAT THE--?!?!

*stunned stare*

Hadn’t I been viciously shoved off the edge of crossed this Bridal Bridge once before and ended up limping my sorry bruised self away down the cold, dark, lonely I’llNeverTrustMenAgain Lane in the wretched town of Jiltedville in the ugly State of Divorcia, vowing I’d never ever EVER cross that big old scary bridge again, hmm?

Damn straight.

Yet there I was, about to cross that bridge again and I didn’t feel the least bit nervous or frightened or unsure or anything. I just felt happy. Happy and blissfully alive! And that is how I felt the entire day. From start to end.

I’m a freak. Clearly.

And I don’t care.

:-)

As for how Scope’s and my wedding day played out—*blissful sigh*—it was truly yummy perfection with sprinkles and hot fudge on top! Nervousness? It didn’t exists. Glitches? There wasn’t a single one. Everything was lovely and I simply can’t imagine a better day. At. All.

We have—ohhhhhh—roughly a zillion pictures of the day’s events, and while I’m not going to show them all to you here, I will be posting a fair few. I doubt they’ll all squeeze into one post, so I’ll likely be splitting the tale up into a couple of posts. Or more. So, buckle up, kids! Here we go:

Gwen and I arrived at the Fairwood Golf & Country Club about four hours before the ceremony started, and along with Callista and several other generously helpful friends and relatives (including Scope’s sister and brother-in-law, my dad and step-mom, and Scope’s friend, Maribeth) we started setting up and decorating….




And, yes, I even ate lunch! Woot!….


But soon I was whisked away into hiding to transform from bagel-noshing, Skechers-wearing fiancée (see above) to beautifully-blushing, Skechers-wearing bride.

Yes. I wore Skechers at the wedding. White ones. In a Kids’ size 4. Which came in a box which says this….


Yep. My shoes were called “I’m Pretty Tall ~ shoes that make you taller!” Callista, Maribeth, Gwen, Rachel and I had a reeeaaalllllyyyyyy good laugh about that while getting ready….


Go ahead, laugh if you must. My feet never once hurt the entire wedding. Not even on the dance floor! :-)


Once we were all dressed (and wedding-oblivious golfers were booted from the private restroom lounge) our photographer, Rachel, got down to business, taking a plethora of pictures….


It’s funny, Callista warned me that the wedding would be a blur to me afterwards, and she must have been right, because I swear I have absolutely no memory of my dad being in the women's bathroom with me! When the heck did THAT happen????….


In a SNAP it was suddenly time for Scope and I to see each other and do family group pictures before the ceremony. I was led out onto the patio and was told to stand with my back to everyone so I wouldn’t see Scope emerge. Scope, as I was told, was going to be blindfolded while he was sequestered in the men’s room with his friend, Tony, and then led out behind me.

And, so, I waited.

Suddenly the crowd on the patio erupted into wild laughter and chatter about toilet paper…. Toilet paper?…. Huh?…. They blindfolded the groom with toilet paper?!

No.

No, they did not….


People, please. Just please. You can NOT leave Scope to his own devices for an extended length of time and NOT expect shenanigans of some sort to blossom, okay? I thought this was common knowledge. That’s right, my darling groom tucked a tail of toilet paper into his drawers to slay the crowd. Because he’s five. And I wouldn’t have it any other way!! :-)

*snicker*

Thank God he was sequestered in the men's room, right? I shudder to think what he might have done with the tampons if he’s been kept in the ladies’ room….

*shudder*

But anyway….

Once Scope’s behind was toilet paper-free again, I got to turn around and we saw each other in our wedding clothes for the very first time. We clean up very nicely, I must say.

We stood for pictures with our families. Here we are with my parents….


Here is my brother-in-law, my sister (who ended up giving birth a mere seven days after!), my dad, me, Scope, my brother, and my mom….


Here we are with Scope’s parents….


Here is Scope’s brother-in-law, Scope’s sister, me, Scope, Scope’s mom, Scope’s dad, and Scope’s brother….


Aaaaaaand this one is my favorite! The three of us. Awwwwww….


And then it was time to hide me away again so guests could be seated for the ceremony to begin. But because I’m mean, I’m going to make you wait a bit for the rest of the story (MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!) - hey, admit it, this post is waaaaayyyyyyy too long already.

Clearly.

[….to be continued….]

© Coracabana